By Briana | February 11th 2015

Our friendship

I’ve been thinking about you and feeling super honored that you’ve invited me into your life.  I don’t take it lightly that you open and read these blogs from me, and I’ll always do my best to provide you with lots of value for your time.

To me, relationships are the most valuable thing in my life: my relationship with my husband, with my children, with my family and friends, and with my community.  Not only do they support me and my mission in the world, they encourage me to show up fully, to be present, and to enjoy life abundantly.

I’ve been asked a lot how I lovingly maintain my relationships, how I find the time, and so I thought I would answer that question for ya, if you’ve ever struggled to balance your ambition with your connection.

First, let me be totally honest: I’m not perfect at this.  Last month I didn’t talk to one of my sisters at all – not because there was any issue, but because we were both really busy and not prioritizing it.  When I realized that I was not making the effort I wanted to in this relationship I reached out to her and reconnected.  It’s all in process.

I’m not a networker.  There are tons of amazing articles out there about becoming a better networker (which is awesome), but that’s not me.  I can network, but it isn’t my jam.  What I value isn’t a lot of acquaintances, but rather quality relationships that feed my soul.  It makes caring for the relationships a joy and honor.

So my suggestion here is to choose your people wisely.  If you’re going to invest your time and energy and love into them, make sure that the connection is right for you.  That they are the kind of humans you want to surround yourself with.

The magic of a bond usually comes when you make the time for it.  So put it in your calendar!  In my calendar I have my weekly hip-mamas group, time to write a letter to someone I love, dinner with friends, family time, reminders to call loved ones, invitations to reach out to a girlfriend, and quarterly uncomfortable dinner parties we throw.

(Uncomfortable dinner party is what we’ve decided to call a dinner party where we invite two couples we know that don’t know each other and they each invite a couple that we don’t know and we all break bread together.}

I put it in my schedule because it matters to me.  I don’t wait to “find time” – I make it a priority.

We all get so busy with our daily lives that it’s easy to forget what’s going on with the people we love.  One trick I use is to make myself reminders to check in if I know they are: going through a break up, pregnant, lost a loved one, feeling depressed, excited about a new project, sick, or stressed.  I know when my friends and family check in on me when I’m going through something, I feel so cared for.   I want to do that for others as well.

Lastly, forgive yourself and others for losing touch and pick up where you left off.  Life is full and there are multitudes of reasons for falling out of a relationship, but if you find yourself missing someone – reach out and reconnect.

At the end of life no one ever says “I wish I spent more time working and less time with my friends and family.”  I promise.

Love,

Briana

PS. My dear friend Rachel is throwing an online event that I’m honored to be part of.  Join me & over 30 experts in the worlds of wellness, transformation, business & lifestyle design & relationships who are walking their talk and living proof that an incredible, adventurous, & passion-fueled life is possible! Check it out here (it’s totally FREE!)

 

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